Y Monday, September 29, 2008

9:13 pm

This must come off as quite the shock to y'all, but I did watch the F1 night race yesterday night.(lol obvious time is obvious.) Now I'm not the most patriotic of people, for that, you're better off clicking the "Joel" link in my blog, nor am I the most sporty of teens.

Yeah, it was only because my house was forcefully crashed by three stragglers who insisted on watching it. So we bought dinner and Dar, Bfoo and Joy headed to my place (in a cab too, cuz it was starting!)

Surprisingly, at the very end, only my mum and I were the ones paying attention to that race. I actually wanted Kimi Raikonnen to win, because well, his name is kick ass and he looks like he's an awesome person. But eh, stuff never goes my way. The poor blighter crashed from the sides and totaled his car(kart?).

They say the physical constitution required to drive in the F1 races is deceptively low. Those drivers are one of the fittest sportsman you'll see, and it's true. There's enormous strain on your poor neck, where G-forces multiply a 1kg helmet into a 7kg one. Talk about heavy. Putting a 7kg load on your head for an hour and forty five minutes makes clerks who stare at computer screens for hours seem lucky.

It's also a mental sport, because, well, goddamn, you do realize that driving that same bloody track for -SIXTY- laps is VERY, VERY boring. It's dangerous, tedious and boring. Your eyes start to water, you start to lose focus and.. next thing you know you pull a Raikonnen.

Evidently, those F1 drivers have never studied in a JC. Now believe me, university life is less rigorous. JC students are required to strategize their sleep times, something which F1 drivers don't have to bother with, since all they ever do is adjust sleep cycles accordingly, and they get enough sleep all the time.

Firstly, we have to split sleep into a few segments.

1) Actual sleep time. Compromised by... just about everything.
2) Compensate during bus rides.
3) Just before assembly, you can sneak in about 20 minutes if you reach school early.
4) During lectures, grabbing quick spurts of shut eye in 5 - 10 minute intervals is quite doable.
5) Tutorials are tough, but if you're good you can get anywhere from 2 to 20 minutes.

It adds up to be enough, somehow. How's that for sleep maximization, eh Lewis?

They say the immense mental stress is something unheard of in other sports as well. Afterall, your life is on the line.

That's why JC students ought to be the ones driving them Ferraris. Obviously they don't know what it's like to try to ninja sleep time during lectures with 3 teachers patrolling the lecture hall. It's also imperative you "sleep but don't look like you're sleeping." Wiggling your pen every 2 minutes is a good strategy, for example.

The age old hide behind the book doesn't help anymore. In fact, you shouldn't even cover your face.

Here's what you should do. Hold your pen upright. That's it. Since there's always at least one retard copying redundant things in the lecture, you can pretend to be one of them. Always works. I've never been caught sleeping. (okay maybe once or twice.)

While juggling all of these like an over-worked clown, your notes SHOULD be filled or you're fucked for that chapter. You should also be comprehending everything that's being said WHILE TRYING TO SLIP IN SLEEP.

How's that for mental stress, Schumacher?!

I tell ya, we really oughta be the ones driving those sleek beauts on the track.

Y Wednesday, September 24, 2008

10:11 pm

Si vis pacem, para bellum. -Latin Quote

If you seek peace, prepare for war.

Si vis pass promos, para bellum. <-Contextualized for relevance.

If you seek to pass promos, prepare for war.

MUGGING MODE TURN ON.

Y Tuesday, September 23, 2008

9:17 pm

You know, (How many times has it been already that I've used this opener?) I've always thought of my life as a pretty boring, uninteresting one. No, unlike other people I'm not going to blame my circumstances. It's just me. Life is ordinary because I don't do anything extra-ordinary.

I'm not hypocritical; I won't deny that I have everything a teenager needs. It's fair to say I do get things I ask for every now and then, but neither do I ask anything much extra. A treat now and then, I suppose. A sheltered life. But of course, nothing too out of the ordinary. Like I said, a boring life by choice.

But today, today, my friends, is a very special day.

No, no, Ian didn't change his controversial stand on certain subjects.

Once again, as with all things interesting, it begins in an SBS bus. This one's a double decker, too.

Mel, Foo, Dan and I were on the 7pm+ bus 12. Yes fellows, that means crowded, because 14 travels to and fro town. We're not the shortest of people, rather large by Singaporean standards, so we don't exactly fit into buses either. (How many times have I said that now?) Naturally we couldn't help smelling up the exit. Of course the bus driver, who plops his ass on that smelly seat for extended hours, doesn't understand the squeeze and yells at us to stop blocking the exit.

Being the good, obedient citizen as the government has encoura- oops, conditioned us to be, I yelled a "Sorry!" back to the bus driver and got about shifting a little. Kindly note that the difference was minimal. The exit was still a cockblock. But hey, I'm happy that he's happy and we're all happy so that's all that matters!

We fucked around about it for a second, and I told 'em

"Eh, poor guy sits 8 hours a day on that bus and drives around the same route. Give chance la. You know, there's a reason why we're wearing this JC uniform and him.. well not so."

Kind of like a 'feel good' statement after something so embarrassing. I'm not the kindest of people, especially with words. They heal and they wound, we're all capable of both.

So for 6 stops we had to shift, squeeze and wrestle with commuters who got on and off the bus.

When it was our stop, Dan mentioned "I'm not giving way anymore, it's our stop." Which makes sense doesn't it? I mean, you don't PUSH the person infront of you out when all of you are getting off at the same stop.

Like most accomplished, intelligent men say, ignorance can be enlightened, but stupidity, PHEW, one tough cookie.

Enter somewhat-decently-dressed-woman-fluent-in-english in her late 50s. (Menopause?)

"Eccuse me. Can you move." said woman.

"Eh we're getting off at the next stop, could you just wait?" Dan

*Silence*

"What? I ask you to move you tell me to wait?"

"No we're getting off at the next stop so I-"

"You are so rude, I ask you move you.." (Forgot what she said exactly, but she was getting nasty.)

At this point of time, Dan got pretty pissed off.

"Jesus christ. Woman." *Throws both hands in air*

And we walked off.

She continued some brainless babbling, so I cut inbetween them and held my hands out.

"Hey ma'am, look, stop, drop it ya? Drop it." Me growing impatient.

FFS I even addressed her nicely. MA'AM. That's what I call my VS teachers. And those ladies deserve every ounce of respect I can spare, and then some.

"YOU STOP THERE YOU. I TELL YOU TO STOP." Enraged woman.

"Stop? Why? No." Dan

"Why? Not happy I tell you to move is it? HUH?" Enraged woman, anger possibly amplified by menopause.

"Angry? ANGRY? I'm NOT angry. I'M PISSED OFF." Angry Dan.

"FUCK OFF." Woman off her bonkers.

Okay, at this point of time, it really got too far. I mean, hey, we're in a crowded street, and you're bumbling along as fast as your little legs can go trying to keep up with our strides which are probably twice as long and fast. So you shout "FUCK OFF" in public? What the hell are you trying to prove?

For all the swearing in this blog, it stays here. I don't go "FUCK YOU WOMAN WITH MENOPAUSE, FUCK YOU." (Not that I want to.) in public do I? No.

Yeah, at this point of time, all of us were pretty shocked. I decided, eh, that's fucked up. So I went up to her and stared her down.

"My GOSH madam. Watch your language! For crying out loud, you're arguing with a.. he's what, secondary four? and you..? For shame madam, act your age!" Indignant Ian!

She pretty much shut up at this point. It was getting embarrassing for her anyway, people were staring. Honestly, I'm only saying this again because of how ridiculous it is. No matter how heated arguments usually get, you don't really give them the royal eff word, especially not against a stranger. That shit's suable for fuck's sakes. I have NEVER seen someone so uncouth and so silly.

Hell, even rowdy boys from bad schools don't go around throwing FUCK OFF to strangers. Just doesn't happen.

Life is interesting indeed.

12:37 am

I was wrong about it all.

There is a god.

His name is George Carlin.

Good man, pity, really. He'll be missed.

Y Saturday, September 20, 2008

1:48 am

What the hell is so fun about WoW?

Dunno. It really isn't. It's frustrating as hell, time consuming, not very pretty, has some of the nastiest people you'll see, the most unnecessary drama and.. and the list goes on, nothing good.

But I'm still playing LAWL.

So anyway, today was a good run. I'm fucking hyper right now. Played 10 games of 5v5 and won 8-2 with a new combination. 4 DPS 1 Healer and just nuke stuff until they die, die and die again. Hella fun, all that coordination and twitch.

You know, maybe it's the whole getting away thing. Escape from reality just for a bit. Like for once we actually matter, have an important role to play - everyone's valuable. Help, self-esteem troubles lawl.

Y Thursday, September 18, 2008

6:59 pm

Yawn. Apparently my tutor's late, so I'm here waiting for him.

Promos are comin' soon! I'm going to pull off a miracle. If this one gets off nicely, it'll be one of the most incredible things ever. Guess I'll have to drop all my targets by at lesat 1 grade, since it's pretty much too late to get As without getting 3 Us for every A.

Anyway, interesting tidbit! Oddly enough, it's about the weather. Yes, people, the weather's the most difficult thing to talk about. It's also the most cliche crap a person can ever think of. I mean, every time you even THINK about people talking 'bout the weather, you can just picture a bench facing a park, a fairly cloudy sky and two British old timers on the bench.

"Weather's a bit gloomeh, isn't it?"

Yeah.

Two observations over today and yesterday.

1) People love to wear jackets in CJ. I know, the LTs can get cold, dreadfully so if it rains. Having said that, oddly, it's just as cold in the canteen at 12 noon with the sun shooting death rays at you. Funny that! Maybe they were lazy to take it off?

Last I wore a jacket, taking it off was a bit easier than rolling the sleeve up. Less warm, too. Fun fact: Most of them were from dance. Hmm.

2) I was walking home yesterday and yup, at about 3pm. Swelteringly hot sun is sweltering. The entire back of my bag was damp, and half my uniform actually changed from light to dark blue. (Not that it could look any worse. Maybe it looked better? Factory worker to air-con repair man now perhaps? I wouldn't know.) Whilst (WHILST?! Now aren't we getting all fancy 'ere..) whining about the heat and wiping my brow for the upteenth time, I noticed a couple in the distance, seated on a bench. (They stopped what they were doing and glanced at me.)

Nothing too odd, except it's 3 in the afternoon and did I mention it was hot? Yes, unbearably so. Here's the thing - the couple was in their uniform, AKA just finished school and probably walked, took the bus, and walked again. God knows how long they were there, but it must have been quite some time, snogging each other, hugging and whatnot. Time passes by real quick when you're having fun doesn't it?

Now, imagine doing this while having your shirt half soaked with perspiration. (It contains urea, which is also found in your pee. =O!) Maybe one of them even had garlic for recess or lunch. Yeouch. Nasty. Before I forget, Singapore is annoyingly moist, so your clothes tend to stick to you. Heat + Moisture = Bacteria breeding ground + Discomfort. Suddenly the whole kissing thing didn't seem so romantic anymore.

Printed the 40 page written report. I feel kinda shitty that so much paper and ink was used but eh, I don't pay for it. Now to bind the thing, but I don't know how!

Singapore is too damned small. Han Shen, you lucky bastard you.

@WoWers: Divine Plea.

"Lord, for the love of god please let the tank live for six seconds while I finish this sentence to restore my mana."
*Tank has died*
"Oh go to hell. Last time I pray to you."-Yzak

EDIT: I speel gudz. Stupid Ian is stupid.

but I'd like to learn your name...

Y Sunday, September 14, 2008

9:15 pm

SENNHEISER CX 500 EARPHONES ARE TEH SEX.

That is all.

2:08 am

So it's been about 2 years, with the first post being the 6th of Sep '06, back when I was still the idiot I was in secondary three. Imbecile, yes, but happy, definitely. Hell, there ain't a VS guy who'll tell you he's happier in JC than back in VS, but you're probably sick and tired of hearing this. Did I mention sick and tired? Yeah, sick and tired.

Anywho, happy 2 year anniversary, rantbox. To the naysayers, keeping a blog isn't gay. It's thereupathic, great for nostalgia and whatnot. Best decision I ever made.

So it's 2.10 am and I'm still up. The day wasn't supposed to go down like this, but hey, shit hits the fan. I'm familiar with it, maybe more so than others, but it's like this nasty distant relative you have. Don't see the bugger often, but when you do, you get a warm fuzzy feeling in your stomach and prepare to drop the soap, bend over and take it from behind, yes, without the lube sir, without the lube. Side note, I'm very sleepy and might not even sound coherent. But you knew that.

So what shit exactly? Two words, written report. Yeah that beast took up bout 6 hours of both Han Shen's (henceforth abbreviated to HS) and my time. Not going to delve into specifics.

Ah well. Main reason why I felt like penning something down was because I browsed through my previous entries. Eh, did lotsa stupid stuff then. The way I wrote actually surprised the hell out of me. The answers to quizzes did in the past right down to the amount of swearing.

I've become a really, really, fucking huge negative nancy. Funny thing is, I concluded I was always like this. Huh. Who cares.

Y Thursday, September 11, 2008

8:25 pm

SO. Promos are in about 18 days, and I'm kinda in the danger zone for retaining.

See it's like this. For math, I might as well have not taken the fucking thing. 3.5/100 when converted to 20% is 0.7. Zero-point-seven.

That translates to almost nothing, over a hundred.

Apparently, I need a sub-pass for GP, three other subjects, and one H2 pass. Goddamn, that means you can only fail ONE subject. That's most probably math. See the difference here is other people go "I think I fail maths liao." For me, I KNOW I'll fail math. All the difference in the world, at the difference of only one word.

Organic chem is being an idiot and refuses to make sense to me; probably because I missed a few lectures, namely alkanes and alkenes, where they introduce the more important mechanisms. Fuck that. Well I'm climbing but slowly. Least today's lecture was easy to digest.

Econs isn't too heartening, I have a test tomorrow, and Market Failure is just fucked up. Doesn't speak to me like the other chapters. On the brighter side, I managed to pass both tests without studying (albeit one of them was open book.) but I could have done so much better if I had just spent 5 minutes reading some crap.

GP.. well. I got my essay back today, nothing fantastic I must admit. I was writing some stuff that I myself was in doubt about, so yeah, arguments were pretty weak. 34/50 isn't half bad, but I'd halve those marks to get a more accurate gauge of what I'll score in the exams. Yes, my teacher is lenient. Too caught up in writing something that's palatable to the layman to write an academic piece of writing.

History is fucked. I'm going to need tons of consultations to work out how the fuck I'm supposed to pen my essays. Of course, and to actually study the damn subject. This is my danger subject. It'll determine if I promote or retain. (Wtf.) If Math is a goner, this is my only other U. Kind of a toss up, really. If I work out all the kinks in writing a history essay, I'm very confident of at least a C.

Fuck that, and SA only needs 35 rank points to promote. That's fucking BS. You heard me. 2 Bs and you promote. Jesus.

Y Thursday, September 04, 2008

10:53 am

Wtf my headphones are broken =\. The sound comes out wonky so I had to re-do the sound balance either all to the left or right, so now both sides are playing what would usually have been just the left side.

It sucks when you hear some screamo dude screaming and like a guitar without the bassist. Sounds weird and painful.

Fuck it, I'm going to have to blow another $150 for a new pair. Fuck fuck fuck. And my ear phones are busted too. Happy holidays indeed.