Y Monday, July 14, 2008
9:02 pm
Evening class. Take a seat. Today we're gonna learn a few new words.fail /feɪl/feyl
–verb (used without object)
1. to fall short of success or achievement in something expected, attempted, desired, or approved: The experiment failed because of poor planning.
–noun
13. Stock Exchange.
a. a stockbroker's inability to deliver or receive security within the required time after sale or purchase.
Yes class. We are all acquainted with the fail shown above. What your other teachers didn't tell you was that there was a third, more useful form of the word.
-verb
1. to be completely devoid of success or anything positive that's worth a damn. ie. that math lecturer fails so hard i don't know if i should laugh or cry myself to sleep.
-noun
2. something that's utterly chock full of.. fail. no other way about it. that's right, you're supposed to point and laugh. ie. CJC math dept is fail.
Now how about that? Useful word isn't it? Much better than the trash you were taught before.
To pair with that word, class, I will be introducing a prefix to that word, for when fail is jst not quite enough to describe how fail something is!
epic
Because I'm so fucking lazy, epic just anything great, spectacular, or large/monumental in nature.
How do we string a sentence or paragraph together with that?!
Here are a few to start you off with.
1) Wow, the math lecturer we had today was epic fail. She seems to think personal insults are funny and somehow makes her a cut above the sub-humans she teaches! Because er, you know, we're supposed to listen while she talks, and she's a teacher, so we're sorta less human. Kinda.
2) Epic failures usually make comments without knowing a crap about what they're talking about. Everyone can (and loves to) make groundless, insulting, sweeping statements, and math lecturers are (surprise surprise!) no different!
3) Most(Not all, MOST.) teachers fail deep down inside. Low paying job, shitty ass hours, tough as nails to stick through until you a)Die. b) Get a better job. They truely fail in an epic fashion when they manage to lie to themselves that they actually enjoy teaching, when in reality, belittling students allows them to feel better about how much they fail.
Afterall, the students they teach are probably going to earn a heck load more money than they will in a life time! Or two. How fail can you get in an old class gathering when people are spitting out jobs like
"Oooh, I'm a Human Resource Manager in *insert MNC here*"
"Oh I run my own small humble business. Bout an annual turnover of a million or two."
"Ah nothing special, just a lawyer."
"Brain surgeon. Pretty stressful."
"Uhm.. *feels penis shrinking* I'm a.. teacher. NO not a primary school teacher, no no. That fails. I'm BETTER than that. I teach in a government Junior College."
"Oh a teacher..? That's ahh.. (remember about emotional control the previous post? That's right!) ah well, that's nice! I mean it's really noble of you! butofcourseinrealityitsucksbigtimei'mjustbeingniceaboutit."
Got a rough idea now, class? Good!
Class dismissed. Remember, I want your fail assignments in first thing tomorrow morning. Three examples at least! Now get out of my sight, failboats.
Right so, school was pretty crap today. I'll leave you smart ones to figure out why. Hence I'm really fucking grumpy!
Had some mass dance crap for PE today. I now know why I pay to watch dances instead of getting paid to dance. I have two left feet, none of which can coordinate worth a damn.
Then later we oopsh. ^_^ maybe I'll fill in this bit the day after tomorrow.