Y Saturday, June 28, 2008
1:18 am
I think I'm really in a bit of a piddle. A big one actually. Just suddenly hit me today. Yes, I do realize stuff like these happen, and really, I'll figure it all out and work something out. But for now.. yeah. Overwhelmed.Guild stuff isn't going so well. I'm out of touch and don't even know the new members. Raids still don't start, I just want to give it all up, let someone take over, I don't know. It's a pity, really. I feel bad for those who've stuck it through and spent so much time and effort only to see it come to naught. Part of me just can't drop things like that and run.
One big factor, are my studies. Really. Fucking screwed. Two words. There. I'm probably one of the failures in chem, my math is a fucked up piece of shit. Shoulda just skipped the MYE and use promos as 100%. Fucking bullshit, H2 maths. So fuckin unfair, why does CJ only have 10 different combinations? Oh yeahhh right. Not an elite school, limited resources, jabber jabber.
Life blows harder than Brooke does. That's saying something.
GP standard in CJ isn't fantastic, I don't fucking understand how I'm scoring 42(Over 50.) and there are people getting 15. Teacher bias can't be so blatantly obvious anyway. So in a more realistic setting, my GP's fucking shot as well.
Let's not delve into Chemistry and History. I fail those. Chinese is a joke.
I don't have a fucking CCA, ain't happy in chess club, it's just killing time. I'm going to embrace all these crap again come next week.
Tomorrow's party is just going to be a brief respite, another outlet before I tether on the edges of sanity yet again. It gives me more reason to miss what I once had.
Fuck, I don't know. I'll try sleeping it off, though something tells me it's just running away again.
This, is our last dance. One that's only ever had a single soul gliding across the jet black ballroom floor.